Been There, Done That by Laura Nethken

Published:

The horrible cold temperatures have been hard on everybody including our dogs, Bo and Duke. We only leave them outside for a few minutes at a time, which of course is still long enough for them to tangle the cable around something.

Their favorite targets seem to be the big logs at the edge of the driveway, although it matters not. If those were moved, they'd just get hung up on the barbecue grill or the picnic table or the trash can or whatever.

Duke got caught on the bumper of the truck once and Bo was stuck on two cinder blocks yesterday. One time, he had the cable so intertwined with the garden hose that I had to put him on a leash to take him in so I could untangle it.

Duke handles the cold better than Bo. He's 10 years older and outweighs Bo by about 50 pounds. Plus, Bo's just a freeze-baby. I don't know if his feet were super cold or actually burning from stepping in the salt last week, but I do know he was majorly ticked off. He had two of his feet in the air and was shaking like a leaf when I snatched him up and hauled him in the house.

He growled for about 20 minutes straight. I should've given him a biscuit. You can't growl and eat a biscuit at the same time.

Like when our oldest son (Bo's "Daddy") was a baby. He couldn't watch himself cry. If he got on a jag, we just stuck him in front of a mirror and like magic, no more tears.

It's a good thing Duke is better equipped for the cold since his new medicine makes him have to pee about every 15 minutes. Maybe now he has a better understanding of what my mother-in-law went through when she took her water pill.

She was scared of Duke and had to have somebody walk her in the house every time she needed to use the bathroom. Right up until the one time she was in a massive hurry. She practically ran up the driveway, busted in the back door and yelled "MOVE, DUKE," nearly mowing him down in the process. She never needed an escort after that.

Duke's back end is moving a lot better now since he got the medicine, although I still don't quite think he's forgiven us for taking him to the vet. Duke hates going to the doctor. Probably with good reason.

Our oldest son and I took him the other day. Duke was pretty impressed with the 45-minute ride until he realized it ended at the doctor's office. Then he was MAD.

They put him up on the table and it was so cold he was shivering so bad his teeth were chattering. And then he got this wild look in his eye as the doctor did the rectal exam. Go figure.

Then the doctor curled Duke's toes under and Duke didn't fix them right away. Evidently that means it's a nerve issue. No pain, just his back end doesn't work too well. Then he got two shots. Like I said, he was MAD.

On the way home, my son stopped at McDonald's and got him a double hamburger to try to make up for the fact that we tricked him. And when we got home, we had to deal with my surly husband who was still miffed because he didn't get to go, too.

But somebody had to stay home with Bo or he would have destroyed the house. He tears up the bathroom trash if he's left alone while somebody goes out to get the mail. I can just picture coming home to a smashed TV, goldfish flopping around on the soaking wet carpet and all the curtains and blinds torn down. It's like "Romper Room" around here as it is.

Copyright 2014 Laura Nethken

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