Been There, Done That by Laura Nethken

Published:

Like nearly everyone else I know, I'm hoping that this winter weather is finally going to go away. I've had enough. I'm done. I'm not going to take it anymore. At least not quietly. I'm sick and tired of the cold and I'm sick and tired of the snow. I'm this close to saying "I hate you, Old Man Winter."

"Hate" is such a strong word, though. Unless you use it in something like "I hate garbanzo beans" or "I hate that people still haven't learned how to drive in the snow."

I can understand maybe with the first snow of the year. Somehow people forget from one year to the next how to drive in it. But come on now, we've had one of the snowiest winters on record.

On my way to work driving in the most recent dumping of the white stuff, I followed a minivan doing all of 30 mph in a 45 mph no-passing zone for about four miles. It had traffic backed up the entire way.

Thanks, pal. I was only going to be a little late to work since I had to brush two inches of "the dusting" of snow we were supposed to get off my Jeep and scraped the windows before I could even leave the driveway. Now I'm going to be a lot late.

And speaking of dusting, how come when I open the door to get the snowbrush, snow pours onto my seats? It's just adding insult to injury.

And how come they can put a built-in defroster in the rear window, but not anywhere else? Why do I have to scrape three windows on each side? Of course, it's easier to do that than it is to get the mirrors cleaned off. I'm always afraid I'm going to break them if I try to scrape them.

Even the kids are sick of the snow now. Snow days are great when you can get outside and build a snowman or an igloo or have an old-fashioned snowball fight. But when you're in a Polar Vortex or an Alberta Clipper and you run the risk of your flesh freezing in the time it takes you to run from the house to the car, it stinks.

When we have to get the state legislature to sign off on allowing schools to have more snow days, it's bordering on ridiculous. Having a snow day off in January really stinks when you have to give up a sunny day in June to make up for it.

Even our dogs are fed up with the snow. The puppy, Bo, was all fun and frolic with the first snow of the season. He practically danced in it. He drug his tongue through the yard and came in the house with a little pile of the white stuff on top of his nose from pushing it along the ground.

Now, we put him on the cable and open the door to let him out and have to push him out the door when he looks and sees that it has snowed again. That's pretty bad when you can tick off a puppy with yet another snowfall.

I suppose there are some people out there who welcome the snow. Our dog, Duke, is OK with it. Frozen ground means no mud. He hates mud. He's a big white dog and he knows it. If he comes in with muddy feet, legs, belly, etc., he's positively disgusted, dreading how long it'll take him to lick himself clean again.

If you make your money over the winter plowing or shoveling, this may have been a good winter for you. Our oldest son and his buddy spent the winter working in snow removal. And thankfully, they are now done with that job. Maybe spring really will be here now that those two aren't praying for snow anymore.

Copyright 2014 Laura Nethken

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